March 07, 2012

Discuss: How do you tell a friend that she is using the wrong foundation?

"Oh, honey, your new foundation looks great. You don't look orange at all!"
We have all been there before.

It can happen anywhere. In your bedroom, a public dressing room, the office, a club, your car... But the situation is always the same: A friend prances up to you excitedly asking, "So? How do I look today?"

As she twirls and flicks her blow-dried hair, all you can think of, "Good grief, her face is ORANGE."

The next thought is, "How do I tell her?!"

You have to tell her of course. She is a good friend after all. Who else will put up with your drunk-dialing at 3 am, laugh at your dirty stories and cry with you on a bad day? You HAVE to. Its your God-given duty to do so. Its practically an Act of Charity.

Unless you are planning to head out and figure that Lil' Miss Orange Face here will make you look more attractive to the boys.

What would you do?

For me, it depends on how close a friend she is but my standard modus operandi is the same. I usually bring the conversation around to makeup before tactfully saying something along the lines of, "Hey, I like your foundation finish but I think its a little too pink/yellow/light/dark for you."

The next time we head out, I try to include a trip to a cosmetics counter as well so she can get a new foundation.

However, those really close to me get the direct: "Dude, what foundation are you using? You look awful! No, I don't care that it's bloody Lancome, you look like you are fifty and over the hill. We are going to pick up guys, not scare them off. Now, let's go back in and do some repair work. NOW."

Of course, I do have the occasional blur friend who, in spite of the many hints and pointers I have given over the years, still insists on using the same ill-matching foundation and stark red lipstick. It got to the point where a group of us schemed and succeeded in "accidentally" pushing her compact off the counter and shattering it.

"Oh, that's okay," she placidly said. "I have a few extra refills at home."

Looks of dismay passed around the loo.

I finally bit the bullet. "Uhm, you know, since it's broken and we are all out... Why don't we get you a new one? This one makes you look kind of... orange?"

She nodded calmly. "I know. But I have always liked it. It kinda suits my image, you know."


I guess that some girls are beyond help.


ksuan said...

Your "orange" story cracked me up, Eli! One of my dearest friends at work often succumbs to the orange look as well, but she is quite self-aware, realises hat she doesn't always have an accurate perception of her own colouring, and always asks me if she looks too bronzed. Also, it helps (her) that I'm quite bad at hiding my horror when she is glowing orange. It's gotten to the point where if she asks and I respond with a mousy "Uhm", she knows, takes zero offence, and pats madly with a tissue until I tell her she's no longer pumpkin-colored.

Kahani said...

Along the same lines... how do you tell a girl she really should shave that 'tache?

Eli said...

Sorry for taking ages to reply but the past 2 weeks have been crazeh.

ksuan: Wow, you and your colleague must be really good friends. At least she doesn't take offense!

Kahani: Hee, maybe you should save that as a question for your readers next Monday.

Anonymous said...

Not to be rude but this blog is really mean spirited.
How do you know that she sees it as a"mistake",maybe she likes that look she is going for.In general,I disagree with telling anyone how to wear their foundation,blush/powder/eyelin­eretc. Everyone has their own style. Many light people tend to go light/lighter or mix it with a luminzer to make themselves brighter/radiant/porcelin like. An example would be dita von teese, who stays out the sun to maintain her light skintone and wears light foundation. Others prefer to be dark/darker andsunbathe or use bronzer all over their skintone. Different people have different preferences. I hate bronzer. But maybe there is someone who loves that deep bronzed look. I cant go to them and say "dont go soo deep in the bronzer" and say its "constructive". There are soo many different styles.who is anyone to tell someone theyre wearing a too light or too dark foundation, because there is no such thing. Nicole and Sam from pixiwoo(huge makeupartists in Britain) sometimes wear paler or darker foundation and it looks gorgeous! as long as people blend it to the neck its fine....some people prefer to look bright/light/white/porcelain/bronzed/darker/suunkissed and radiant. Live and let live! also, many people's necks or faces are lighter/darker than other parts of their body! some people choose lighter or darker foundations in respect to that! leave it be.
If she likes that look..thats on her! someone right now can tell you that your lipgloss is too "sheer" or too gloppy or too "pink". but there is no such thing, we all have our preferences!
I have many friends and alot of them deep bronze, I personally dont like broney looks..but just because I dont like it..doesnt mean I will go up to them and say "HEY,DONT OVERBRONZE,DO IT IN THIS COLOR AND THIS SHADE". thats tacky.
So I wouldnt tell them, therye grown adults and they can make thier own decision about how to wear their makeup. Just like everyone else in the world If my friend had lipstick on her lips..THATS A MISTAKE! but to tell someone what shade to wear..thats just being rude.
Anywho, I would like to thank the blog owner fo rletting people get their info across on her page.
God bless.

Kahani said...

Hi ladyinred - I'm sorry you feel my blog-mate Eli's post was mean spirited. I know Eli and she's the sweetest thing so I'm sure her post was never intended as such.
You're right that people have a right to use makeup however they wish. But to be fair, what if the girl has no idea that her foundation is oxidising after she leaves the house and is turning her orange? If she likes it then more power to her. But what if she hates it and mortified that she never knew? It's like when you let another girl know that a button on her shirt is undone. It's uncomfortable but surely it's kinder to let her know?